On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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