do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
