Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
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