he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
he laminated a picture of his dick.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
