Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize