Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize