They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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