Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
