I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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