His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I need a hoe opinion
go on
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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