Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
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