Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
