I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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