I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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