Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
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