I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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