Non-Jews are for practice
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
