At least make sure they are 18
Why
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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