You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
