The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize