For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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