Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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