? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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