I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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