Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
