The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
