I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
