As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
