its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
