How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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