if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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