if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
