It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
