Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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