I want to stick my p in your. b.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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