Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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