There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize
