yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
