She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
