Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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