i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Randomize
