We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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