I think I can smell my own vagina right now
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
