She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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