Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
where does the pee come out of this thing
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
