U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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