do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
