ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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