So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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