things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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