idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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